There’s a 2012 Doomsday Turkey in my Crop Circle

Wow, look at that title for some keyword stuffing! Stuffing… get it?

Phoenix? Turkey? They're both birds, so it's close enough (M & Y PORTSMOUTH)

Phoenix? Turkey? They're both birds, so it's close enough (M & Y PORTSMOUTH)

The Telegraph: bedrock of traditional journalism, pinnacle of UK news reporting– I’m sorry, I can’t finish that sentence, I’m too busy crying with laughter.

Seriously. I mean, seriously. Sure, everyone needs to remain competitive in this ultra-fast world of social media and transient online traffic, but there’s a lot to be said for keeping your integrity too. In this master stroke of continued patchy reporting from the UK’s Telegraph we have a serious ‘news’ report about a crop circle, that depicts the Phoenix flying from the ashes. Or is it a turkey?

What could this possibly mean? Oh yes, I might have guessed. Obviously it means the world is going to end on December 21st 2012. What a coincidence, those Mayan fellas have been saying the same thing all along. Now we have crop circles? And crop circle enthusiasts telling us it’s the end of the world? Holy crapcakes, doomsday really is coming. I’ve been such a fool.

The saving grace about this article is that it hasn’t been filed under ‘science’, unlike the “Mars Skull” hilarity a few weeks ago. But that’s the article’s only saving grace.

I’d understand if there was a little scepticism in the tone of the report, or perhaps a little light-hearted banter about aliens and their fetish for bending corn, but unfortunately this is an article that jumps to one huge conclusion:

Crop circles = Doomsday

It really is that simple. Reading signs in bent corn has been the fodder for doomsday theorists for as long as there have been doomsday theories and this report does nothing to challenge that. Is it really that hard to find a skeptic/scientist/logical thinker in Wiltshire these days?

I might be missing something here, but where’s the link between these crop circles and doomsday in 2012? That’s right, there isn’t one.

And I’m now certain that crop circle depicts a turkey

Source: Telegraph.co.uk (YES, I know! The sodding TELEGRAPH!)

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19 responses to “There’s a 2012 Doomsday Turkey in my Crop Circle

  1. Oh astroengine thank you for poking mockery at the foolish desperation of the media yet again. I saw this picture earlier and thought how stylish and artistic it looked until it was ruined by the crazy description of doomsday nonsense.I followed your twitter link here and read your post and I have some info for you regarding the Skull on Mars story you blogged recently. The second person quoted by the Telegraph was me! The story begins as a joke on the Mars Rover Blog and spread around the world getting crazier as it went. I blogged about it on my site. http://foundonmars.com/opinion/equinox/ive-been… after Phil Plait of BadAstronomy made such fun of me and Hort that I had to respond. I must go retweet you now. :)

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  3. Wow that was an amazing crop circle. I remember the crop circles that was believed are made of aliens in some corn fields to different places.

  4. It's just a creative picture that has no meaning to future predictions. The artist must be on drugs. To mow down some grass on ground level I must admit that it is a wonder how the artist knows which way to turn from 160 degrees to 360 degrees or up and down. It was a plan in motion to stir up some news and make headlines.

  5. experts say it looks like a pheonix, which means rebirth.there is another crop circle with alotta lines and crap and experts decided that part of it says 13 men and 13 woman.so i predict that extra terrestrials will take 13 men and 13 woman after doomsday and recreate mankind.

  6. experts say it looks like a pheonix, which means rebirth.there is another crop circle with alotta lines and crap and experts decided that part of it says 13 men and 13 woman.so i predict that extra terrestrials will take 13 men and 13 woman after doomsday and recreate mankind.

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